Random Thoughts and Events

Photo of the day. The cat and dragon are good friends.

Feel OK today, but yesterday was hell.

I was so tired, it was an effort to walk from one room to another. I know that sounds overly dramatic, but believe me, it's the truth. It zaps any bit of energy you may have had. It got worse as the day went on. By the time Ray (the husband) got home, my fever was up to 100.3. I soon after went to bed after drinking a ton of orange juice, didn't eat either.

2am. I had a panic attack. This is not the first time one woke me out of a sleep. You feel like you're having a coronary, pains in your chest, across your back, sweating, can't breathe. I sat up, sat there, then went into the kitchen, took a Xanax, drank some water and took my temperature again. Now I'm BELOW normal, geez. It was 95.4.

I went to sit in the living room with a glass of water, until I felt it passing. If you've never had a panic or anixiety attack, it is simply terrifying. Even though you *know* you're not having a heart attack, you think you are every time.

Got up again at 5am, fed the cat, took my temperature again, gone up again to 97.6, still below normal. This chemo, good Lord, really screws your body up. My feet are KILLING me. I can't stress that enough. I soaked them for a hour, today they don't hurt. You never know what's gonna happen from one day to the next.

Depending on how I feel, we're gonna try and pretty up the outside of the house this weekend. We'll see....

I'm a big fan of Most Haunted. Love ghost shows. It's LIVE this Friday, cannot wait!

Then another Sopranos. Cannot imagine who's gonna go next. My feeling? SOMETHING is gonna come up again about Adrianna and I don't trust Phil as far as I can throw him, and AJ seems to be losing his mind in a period of three weeks. Damn, I'm gonna miss this show! I hate when shows you run through the rooms to watch go away. I loved The West Wing, I cried when that went off, no lie. Six Feet Under, another great show.

Read yesterday that Mike Love lost a lawsuit he filed against Brian Wilson. I should add this is about the 4th suit he filed against him. Being a lifelong Beach Boys fan, I gotta tell you, first, I never liked Mike Love, but I think he's a real creep for suiing Brian so many times. WHO the hell would he be WITHOUT Brian? A mechanic? A check out clerk at Kroger's? Sure do miss the Beach Boys, the version they have now is NOT The Beach Boys. They were Brian, Carl and Dennis Wilson, with Mike Love and Al Jardine. I don't know what this version is, but maybe Love should consider another career instead of sponging off the Wilsons, which he's done his whole life.

This Iraq business. I'm not gonna go on and on, cause I could probably write ten pages, but it seems no matter what the Congress comes up wth it, it's never going to pass. This dolt that calls himself the Decider, will never ever let anything go through, because he's a stubborn child, he started this and he's gonna drag it out until there's another president, and it's THEIR problem. Can't he see on any level, this whole thing is a disaster? We gotta get out? WHY the hell are we there anyway? I never seem to see a clear cut answer to that. WMD? Nah. 9/11? As much as they'd love that, that ain't true either. I don't know why we're there! It's a bloody disaster, why not admit this is a failure and get out? His poll ratings may actually go above 29% if he did that.

Gas. Crikey. Living up the boonies, you gotta drive to get anywhere. It's costing a fortune for gas. 25 gallons cost $97! 97 DOLLARS!

Hope the way I feel right now continues, I don't feel sick, I don't feel like I'm gonna crawl through the rooms. We'll see how it goes. But Monday is chemo again, so it starts all over.